Молчаливая ночь [with w_cat] - страница 2

[17] Ten days later they’d celebrated little Christmas in Omaha, where Tom had accepted an appointment in the prestigious pediatrics unit of the hospital. We bought that crazy artificial tree in the clearance sale, she thought, remembering how Tom had held it up and said, “Attention Kmart shoppers…”

[18] This year, the tree they’d selected so carefully was still in the garage, its branches roped together. They’d decided to come to New York for the surgery. Tom’s best friend, Spence Crowley, was now a prominent surgeon at Sloan-Kettering.

[19] Catherine winced at the thought of how upset she’d been when she was finally allowed to see Tom.

[20] The cab pulled over to the curb. “Okay, here, lady?”

[21] “Yes, fine,” Catherine said, forcing herself to sound cheerful as she pulled out her wallet. “Dad and I brought you guys down here on Christmas Eve five years ago. Brian, I know you were too small, but Michael, do you remember?”

[22] “Yes,” Michael said shortly as he tugged at the handle on the door. He watched as Catherine peeled a five from the wad of bills in her wallet. “How come you have so much money, Mom?”

[23] “When Dad was admitted to the hospital yesterday, they made me take everything he had in his billfold except a few dollars. I should have sorted it out when I got back to Gran’s.”

[24] She followed Michael out onto the sidewalk and held the door open for Brian. They were in front of Saks, near the corner of Forty-ninth Street and Fifth Avenue. Orderly lines of spectators were patiently waiting to get a close-up look at the Christmas window display. Catherine steered her sons to the back of the line. “Let’s see the windows, then we’ll go across the street and get a better look at the tree.”

[25] Brian sighed heavily. This was some Christmas! He hated standing in line-for anything. He decided to play the game he always played when he wanted time to pass quickly. He would pretend he was already where he wanted to be, and tonight that was in his dad’s room in the hospital. He could hardly wait to see his dad, to give him the present his grandmother had said would make him get well.

[26] Brian was so intent on getting on with the evening that when it was finally their turn to get up close to the windows, he moved quickly, barely noticing the scenes of whirling snowflakes and dolls and elves and animals dancing and singing. He was glad when they finally were off the line.

[27] Then, as they started to make their way to the corner to cross the avenue, he saw that a guy with a violin was about to start playing and people were gathering around him. The air suddenly was filled with the sound of “Silent Night,” and people began singing.

[28] Catherine turned back from the curb. “Wait, let’s listen for a few minutes,” she said to the boys.

[29] Brian could hear the catch in her throat and knew that she was trying not to cry. He’d hardly ever seen Mom cry until that morning last week when someone phoned from the hospital and said Dad was real sick.

[30] Cally walked slowly down Fifth Avenue. It was a little after five, and she was surrounded by crowds of last-minute shoppers, their arms filled with packages. There was a time when she might have shared their excitement, but today all she felt was achingly tired. Work had been so difficult. During the Christmas holidays people wanted to be home, so most of the patients in the hospital had been either depressed or difficult. Their bleak expressions reminded her vividly of her own depression over the last two Christmases, both of them spent in the Bedford correctional facility for women.

[31] She passed St. Patrick’s Cathedral, hesitating only a moment as a memory came back to her of her grandmother taking her and her brother Jimmy there to see the creche. But that was twenty years ago; she had been ten, and he was six. She wished fleetingly she could go back to that time, change things, keep the bad things from happening, keep Jimmy from becoming what he was now.

[32] Even to think his name was enough to send waves of fear coursing through her body. Dear God, make him leave me alone, she prayed. Early this morning, with Gigi clinging to her, she had answered the angry pounding on her door to find Detective Shore and another officer who said he was Detective Levy standing in the dingy hallway of her apartment building on East Tenth Street and Avenue B.